Doggy Blog

Dogwalking 101: WHAT THE HAIL

Yesterday started out like any other day. Made breakfast, checked emails, did some work, made some coffee, got my schedule together, headed out the door. Notably missing from that is "check the forecast." This is a trend that goes back to my youth: walking out the door unprepared in whatever clothes were clean at the exact moment I needed them. It has not served me tremendously well throughout the years and I have a history of showing up to school/work/graduation wet with rainwater/shivering/sweating/clothes torn from a tornado. These days I typically have an umbrella tucked into my backpack at all times BUT because I just moved apartments it is still packed away in a box somewhere. So again, I bounded out of the door unprepared, hopped on my bicycle and shot down Ashland ready to begin another day.


Foreshadowing (forepuddling)

Foreshadowing (forepuddling)


First few walks are grand! Sunny. Hot. Maybe a few clouds in the far distance but we should be alllll good. What's that? Wind startin' up? Oh well, nothing to worry about, everyone knows dogs LOVE wind. Hmm. That wind is blowing those scattered clouds closer to me. And where they were now sits a big coaldark mass, angrily glaring at me. Cackling at my umbrellaless, jacketless existence. Daring me to continue to remain outside. A few drops of water hit my forearm. I look up. I ascribe this water to a leaky air conditioning unit despite not seeing one. My pace quickens. I bike halfway to my next house and it begins raining. No denying it now. I seek refuge under a large tree. This is fine. As long as that wind doesn't come back, I should be able to stay under here until this wee summer storm passes us by. Wind picks up. Rain intensifies. Tree cover no longer keeping me totally dry. Angry stormgod cloud laughs at my mortal frailty. Rain is coming down in diagonal sheets. At least it's a warm summer rain. What's that sound? Sounds like ball bearings are hitting the hoods of cars or something. HAIL?! It's August! Time to make a break for it. I scoot out from under the tree and head for the nearest alcove. Make it there in about 5 seconds. My back is soaked. My hat is soaked. My backpack is soaked. My spirit is dry. I survive. The rain passes after about 15 minutes. I air dry. I move on with my day.

I got caught in TWO MORE STORMS LIKE THAT YESTERDAY. I won't bore you with the details, as they were EXACTLY THE SAME experiences. The second storm broke my spirit. Getting wet and then drying off and then getting wet again is a fate worse than death. I laughed at the third storm and raised my hands to the heavens like Andy Dufresne in the Shawshank Redemption.

I will say that no dogs actually got wet in the making of this Thursday afternoon. Every time I got caught in the wet, I was either heading to or heading from a pup. This is good, because a wet dog requires quite a bit of extra maintenance. Their feet are like chamois leather (which I just found out is made of a porous leather from the skin of a European goat) that absorb massive quantities of water and never quiiiiite get dry. Combine that with some wet dirt, or "mud" if you've graduated college, and you got a real mess brewin'. Luckily, we at Home Treat Home are old hands at the post-rain cleanup game so you all have nothing to worry about! Here's to a dry Friday! Although it is 58 degrees apparently so maybe I should change out of this tanktop and rugby short combo. Nah.

Sean

 

O Captain My Captain

Captain, the consumate host, greeting me at the door.

Captain, the consumate host, greeting me at the door.

Captain is a wire fox terrier with a heart of gold. He always greets me at the door with that crooked, fanged smile fitting to the general head shape of wire fox terriers and typically a lopsided ear situation, as in the picture to the right.

He will then immediately head off to find a tennis ball. Luckily, he's super easy to wrangle and leash up and I reckon part of that is that he knows that while we're not playing with tennis balls RIGHT NOW, we DEFINITELY WILL after our walk.

We head down the stairs at a loping pace and rocket out the door, ready to take on the world. And the squirrels. All the squirrels. Much like Liam Neeson in Taken, Captain has a very particular set of skills for dealing with unsavory characters, which in this case (and much unlike Mr. Neeson, unless there is a very strange sequel planned) are small urban woodland creatures.

Upon seeing a squirrel skittering up a tree, the Cap'n explodes forwards like a defensive end in the NFL, leaping up the tree two or three bounds and growling a bit. It's very impressive. His dedication is likewise impressive, as he would probably remain at the tree for hours, just waiting for that lil squirrel to make a mistake. However, a short tug on the leash, and we're back to walkin'.

Cap has this great bouncy stride that causes his lil velveteen ears to bob up and down with each step. Truly a dream of a walk.

A boy and his ball. 

A boy and his ball. 

After our 30 minute jaunt, we head back inside for some light calisthenics—meaning tossing the tennis ball and watching Captain lose his ENTIRE MIND as he retrieves it. It's a delight to watch. As you can see in the picture to the left, he has a great many toys, but only really cares about the spherical, yellow-green ones. The one in his mouth in the picture is his personal favorite, as it is larger than a normal tennis ball and has a squeaky element inside of it. It's also the easiest one to get out of his gaping maw, which is nice.

Occasionally, he will do this adorable thing where, after some tug-of-war with the ball, the Cap will drop it and begin vigorously licking my face. This is obviously a very common "dog thing," but that doesn't make it any less awesome.

A boy and his dogspit-covered face.

A boy and his dogspit-covered face.

After we're done with our tennis ballesthenics and face licking, we get to engage with Captain's most idiosyncratic trait—and my personal favorite part about him. The dog absolutely LOVES baby carrots. His total devotion to the orange nubbins positively dwarfs his hatred of squirrels and his love of tennis balls COMBINED.

Damn near took a finger off here.

Damn near took a finger off here.

As soon as I make a move for the fridge, Cap will dart behind me and park his butt on the floor. Then, with all the jittery patience of a junkie waiting for his dealer, he will sit and watch me take the container out of the fridge, crack the top, pull out his favorite lil root vegetable, and dangle it above him. Sometimes he will wait for me to drop it into his eager gob. Sometimes however, he will ROCKET UPWARDS WITH THE FORCE OF A THOUSAND APOLLO MISSIONS AND TAKE WHAT IS RIGHTFULLY HIS. And as I mentioned before, he has the quickness and fortitude of thigh of an elite NFL athlete, so there is little a puny human like myself can do to deny him. It's a spectacle and I love it.

Godspeed Captain, may your reign be long, peaceful, and prosperous.

Sean